Friday, September 11, 2009

The day I will Remember....Always.....

I was only in High School when this happened.

September 11th, 2001.

Doesn't seem like so long ago.

I can even recall exactly what I was wearing....

It was a navy blue shirt, my new pair of stone wash jeans, white and silver Nikes, and my hair was in a ponytail....I was getting ready for school.....

My mom got a call from my neighbor who said that something was happening in New York, and we needed to turn on the news....I flipped on channel 4 and saw the 2nd plane hit not three minutes later. I screamed for my mom, who was outside on the phone.

I don't know how I got to school that day, but all of our classes were cut short. Teachers dismissed us if we asked to leave and our parents were called to come get us. My friend Linny lived nearby and I went to her house after calling my mom to tell her I was safe and with all of my friends. We stayed in her house all day.

we cried and cried and cried.

I'd never felt so afraid and so unsure of what to do.

I prayed for all the people who we saw jump from the WTC before it collapsed. I prayed for all the families I knew would be crying that night. I prayed that the firemen and the police that day would find the strength they needed to keep going.

I'm not sure how I got home. I think my friend's mom took me home where my parents were waiting. We watched the news all night. The next day, I didn't go to school. I felt sick.  I remember curling up on my bed and crying so hard. 

The next day, I went to donate blood with four of my friends. I went to church and prayed. 

but most of all, I remember watching the news, always listening to the radio and praying....and hoping that I would be able to find some outlet for the pain I felt. and it never really came....I wanted to, with all my heart to get in a plane and go to New York. I wanted to help so badly. I felt that the only way I could let the anger and pain out was to dig in that rubble left behind. To move the chunks of debris myself and clear the mess away. I remember around September 19th, 2001 asking my mom if she would send me to New York. She was scared. She didn't want her little girl to go. So I contented myself as best as I could with organizing blood drives and raising money to help the families who survived that day....

It was awful feeling so helpless....sitting on an entirely different coast line. Wishing, wishing with all my heart that I was closer. I wanted to hand those poor firemen a bottle of water with my own hands or tell the men and women working on the site just how much we cared. How much I cared....

Before I knew it the year anniversary arrived.

I know what I was wearing then. A simple red shirt and dark jeans. I watched the memorial service, and cried. I cried until I felt sick. 

Each year after that day people seem to forget more. Or seem to forget just what happened. I read some comments on youtube showing footage of that day and people making snide comments. The most horrible one I've seen was someone simply writing the word "Splat" regarding some footage showing the people jumping from the WTC.

What makes people feel that this day is something to laugh about?  Every single one of those people who died left a family behind. Someone loved each and every one of those people. They were mothers, fathers, sisters, brothers, cousins, friends, husbands, wives, children, grandchildren.....they were people.  People who died for no reason, who were going about their every day lives and found themselves in a horrible situation.

I would never want to be faced with that choice. face a burning death or throw myself into the air and fall.  I wonder, when I see this footage, if the firemen and the police that day see that day in their minds. If they see the people they couldn't save from that day behind their eyes or in their dreams....

I pray for the families of the ones who are left behind to deal with knowing there was no way they could have said goodbye....

and I pray for the City of New York itself, to heal. Because pain like that is something that becomes etched in the stones of the buildings and the gravel of the streets. 

I pray we never forget that day. I know that many will argue over the outcome of it all....war, the president the polices we put into place in that time....but let us never, never forget the lives of the innocent people lost that day. of families who lost loved ones and of children whose parents never came home.

Never forget...


4 comments:

King of New York Hacks said...

Gauche,

No need to wonder about the Police and Firefighters who were there...or any other first responders or humans that took the time to participate then..or now..we are still healing.... and reading your words make me feel grateful, that WE march on..for the same common cause..the same common....purpose.
Never forget ?
With writers like yourself thank heavens, nobody ever will. God bless you.

-Edward- King of New York Hacks

JennyMac said...

Wonderful post. And it is not something we "Americans need to get over" as one blogger wrote. So disappointing to see those snide comments. Would one make those same snide comments if their family was directly involved.

Your tribute is lovely.

Anonymous said...

I've read so many 9/11 recollections. I will certainly remember yours. Thank you.

Gauche said...

King,

thank you. your words mean a lot to me. :) God keep you.

Jenny,

once more. thank you. I doubt many people think how hurtful their comments can be.

Nickie,

well you're new here. :) welcome. and thank you for stopping by.